A reader just forwarded me this interesting article from the Sex Is blog about what is and isn't vanilla sex. It's interesting to read, but maybe it would be good not to start categorizing every sex act and just stick to the ones we like, rather than trying to conform to a label.
Also, I disagree with the author about one thing. I think anal sex is definitely vanilla for gay men. Strap-on sex seems vanilla for lesbians, but I'm not a lesbian so I might be wrong.
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